Better Than Me
by BigRed502
Summary: Michael regrets what he's done...


**Title: Better Than Me**

**Summary: He's not ready to let go**

**Song: "Better Than Me" by Hinder**

The wind rustled the leaves in a nearby tree on that cool autumn morning. Only a year had passed, but so much had happened. He stood there, flowers in hand, not ready to let them go yet.

Not ready to let her go yet.

_I think you can do much better than me  
After all the lies that I made you believe  
Guilt kicks in and I start to see  
The edge of the bed  
Where your nightgown used to be  
I told myself I won't miss you  
But I remembered  
What it feels like beside you_

"Syd, honey, I'm home." Michael called when he entered their apartment after returning from a long day of work. He set his briefcase by the door and took off his coat, hanging it on the coat tree by the door. It had been a long day full of phone calls, angry clients, and small mishaps that made him to feel relieved to be home.

"Syd?" He called again when he got no answer to the first one. He turned the corner into the dinning room, finding her with her head down at the dinner table. "What's wrong?" He asked.

"What's wrong? What's WRONG?!" Sydney yelled, throwing her hands in the air and standing from her chair. "Where have you been Michael?!"

"I was at work, why are you so fussy?" Michael asked, irritated that she was yelling at him. He didn't want to fight. He was tired from work and all he wanted to do was sit down to a nice, quiet dinner with her.

"God, Michael, I can't believe you." Sydney hissed, her tone clearly telling him she was angry. "Did you not remember about dinner tonight?"

"I'm sorry, I completely forgot." Michael apologized, taking a step towards her. She backed away, not forgiving him.

"Do you not listen when I talk? I told you at least eight times to be home by _seven_."

"It slipped my mind. I had a bad day at work…" Michael tried to tell her why he had been so foolish.

"It's Thanksgiving! How can you _forget_ Thanksgiving!" She cried, hurt visible in her eyes. He hated making her mad, but it was even worse to see her in pain. Especially if he had caused the pain.

_I really miss your hair in my face  
And the way your innocence tastes  
And I think you should know this  
You deserve much better than me_

"Syd, I'm here now, can't we just eat now?" Michael pinched the bridge of his nose. He could feel a headache forming from all the screaming and yelling.

"No." Sydney crossed her arms over her chest. "It's cold."

"Can't you heat it up?"

"Do I look like a maid?!" Sydney said, glaring at him. "If you had been home, we wouldn't even have this problem!"

"I'm sorry I was out making money while you can't." He replied sarcastically. He knew she had quit her job so they could try to start a family. He knew he shouldn't have brought it up, but he was getting irritated by her unwillingness to try to fix the problem.

"I can't believe you…" Sydney stared at him, shocked he would bring that up. "You know what? I don't wanna talk to you anymore." She started to leave the room.

"Fine." Michael retorted.

"Ugh!" Sydney fumed, stomping out of the dining room and into the hallway. "I can't stand you!"

"Well, same to you." Michael reciprocated as she grabbed her coat and car keys, leaving the house with tear-stained cheeks.

_While looking through your old box of notes  
I found those pictures I took  
That you were looking for  
If there's one memory I don't want to lose  
That time at the mall  
You and me in the dressing room  
I told myself I won't miss you  
But I remembered  
What it feels like beside you_

She purposefully slammed the door of the car, wanting to make noise. She put the keys in the engine as she wiped her tears away with the back of her hand. Starting up the car, she pulled out of the driveway.

Making a left out of their street, she failed to notice the other car speeding towards her.

_The bed I'm lying in is getting colder  
Wish I never would've said it's over  
And I can't pretend that I won't think about you when I'm older  
Cause we never really had our closure  
This can't be the end_

They said she didn't feel anything. They said she didn't even have time to react. They said she died instantly.

What they didn't say was he would miss her so much that he wouldn't want to live. They didn't say he'd want to burn her pictures, just to forget the pain. They didn't say he would drink himself into depression.

_I really miss your hair in my face  
And the way your innocence tastes  
And I think you should know this  
You deserve much better than me_

Everyday he missed her. Everyday he wished he could do it all over again. Everyday he couldn't help but ache for her.

Feeling a chill through his jacket, he decided it was time to leave. He knelt down before the headstone, laying the flowers before it and gently tracing the carved letters.

He would never forget her.

_You deserve much better than me_

**{Fin}**


End file.
